Picturing Self
Today
is holiday – being Ram Navami, Baba Saheb Ambedkar’s birthday & Baishakhi. Millions
of good people take inspiration & make their life’s goals to walk in the
paths prescribed by the great persons. I was born somewhat 42 years ago in a
small village in Sonepat District. I don’t know whether the Almighty had any
scheme in his mind for my incarnation on this earth. I only know self a body of
certain stature or skeleton with flesh & skin clad, and a bit sensation
called ‘Prana’ infused. A body system keeps it alive by feeding, inhaling &
exhaling, locomotion, etc., and a little mind to think which always remain engrossed
- at times in essentials and often in unnecessary ignoble too. Almost half life
is already spent, and not much is known to it. I don’t know my directions,
goals, settings, internal programming of my manufacturing & tasks
prescribed. I am just like a computing machine but with no operator in picture,
hence almost not-operational or only a little bit is used. There is no use of this
sturdily constituted inner machine if not powered & skillfully operated. I am
quite numb as don’t know even what I am. Here either the builder or the
operator knows who shall put it to use after checking configurations &
loading necessary software, a necessary implant. So, a skilled operator is immediately
required to avoid uselessness & obsoleteness too as then advance technology
will come, and no one likes to work on an old model. Maybe the operator will
not know the machine’s constitution & its working.
My writing-purpose here is to explore self in me, where I am hidden – what & where is that? The heart is not a centre of thinking, but is blood-pumping machine with chest-armor alround for its physical safety. It is only described so in the ancient poems. Yes, brain is definitely the centre of thinking, and also the source of realization. It is the master of neurons feeling the body-sensations & thoughts erupted due to reactions between neurons or due to their nature to remain active. Mind thinks necessary & also unnecessary also often when idle. Self-exploration means the concerted effort for unified realization or doing away the mind’s activities from unnecessary wonderings to a focused one. It means the mind-body discipline, and exploring the life’s pitfalls & rises, and analyzing reasons & setting the right future-activities. A man can explore his self’s life - if not full then up to certain extent, and can overcome limitations steadily. Life is great, and should be lived in a worthy way. One can set self in an intelligent class, and improve self’s image in own eyes & of outside world. One can overcome life’s difficulties & lead a life of possibilities, and can do away the negativities, and soothe the outside world. People can know & trust him as an honest, modest, humble, simple, a duty-bond, responsible, responsive & trustworthy learned fellow. He can influence ambiance with positive energy and feel its effects too. World is good often but man being perplexed in own problems, assumes it as troublesome which is wrong. Being self as bad does not mean that everybody is so. Similarly, one should not construe others as inferiors, rather in many cases, they are superior.
Even if I feel self as intelligent then the world is already there, and I am to live here being only the abode. So, leave the thought of the world – it is happy where it is as everyone is responsible towards self & that does not concern me. However, a true self-realization can free a bit of energy for others too. It is better to help people needing due to own reasons. Life’s first aim is to realize self, and then contribute to uplift others. It shall raise the mind’s level, and have a greater sense for self & others. Life is not only a breathing or body’s tasks-machine but much more, however, to learn that requires to go near, find a friend & solace in self. I can forget others & so-called their injustice & enhance my capacities for betterment. I can little bit anticipate the future course of things & possibly influence them by positive intervention for common good. I can stop blaming others, and find proximity with self & start truly respecting others. I can practically implement the best management practices into my working to bring positive results. I can generate a goodwill for self & others and call self a true human being. I can raise ignoble birth status into a learned entity, and positively transform of lives of common people by acts, help, moral support, concerns. I can positively change the people’ opinions for selves & others, and help developing some good citizens really imparting to the future world. I can understand my worth & others’ helps which I still ignore, and rather be truly obliged. I can leave indulging with people in ill-thinking due to illiteracy, physical conditions & wrong environments.
I need to anticipate poor self-esteem. Inappropriate behavior by somebody maybe the result of his / her own mental sickness which needs medication and not the rebuking. Others may need concerns; youngsters need love & not the bashings always. I owe great responsibility towards parents & siblings with whom I grew up. I must help them also, and my motivation / persuasions should pave their ways to knowledge, prosperity & good education. Help people to transform/shape lives & attain life’s unlimited opportunities and gain success. Lead them to go beyond body-limits, and realize some mindfulness in the life. Respect great people of community, and help many to be so. Find time to talk to people, and help them in sailing right paths and fighting odds - mostly self-created social ills. Do something to improve possibilities / opportunities & bring that into use.
I need to raise several questions in day-to-day life, and answer them by brain-storming. Life should be active & not-weeping. Think correct and strategize implementation by abdicating procrastination, being seen in many spheres of life. Make this Today great, take tasks into hand & accomplish. Learn from the process-follies, and resolve not to repeat. There are many unseen numerous wonderful paths. Life has a limited span & energy, but needs be lived fully. Don’t leave its single bit unlived. Fill every moment with greater life, and in all who come into your touch. Often pen down the ideas, and go as deep as possible. Enlighten self by continuing in this path. Mind is great & wonderful when trained in a purposeful channelized way. Speak mind often in pages along with pen. Speak to fellow beings, let them feel your good heart (if so) for them, and do every bit positively for the nation/organization. Be pleased with good intensions and don’t speak ill of others & rather find reasons, if possible, instead of rebuking. Become a forgiving fellow as men act out of their infatuations / habits, and don’t know the correct ways. Be a working fellow, and don’ much bother about others. Be the best worker and produce the excellent results. Behave well & learn from the superiors. Thank God for blessing good mind. Make goals, and do all to accomplish in time. Help superiors in deciding, and clear pendency. Manage things by dividing them into parts & work. Demand work from colleagues without hurting. They should keep good intensions in mind, do happily without feeling pressure taking it as their duty. Make LIFE to live intimately forever, and have intimacy with self & others. Train mind by concentration, and establish self as a good worker. Find more purposes of life more frequently.
Pawan
Kumar,
13th
December, 2013 Wednesday, Time 00:10 A.M. (Mid Night)
(From
my Dairy 14th April’ 2008, New Delhi Time 4 PM)
